When I think back to when I first started, I remember looking at social media and feeling so frustrated because it seemed like everyone was doing better than me. There were endless pictures of perfect weddings in the exact style I liked and it drove me crazy!
Why was I so behind? Why wasn’t I getting those clients? What were those girls doing that I wasn’t?
It almost made me give up on so many occasions and it certainly didn’t help me! Now I look back, I can see how ridiculous it was to compare myself to others and how harmful to my own business.
There are three huge reasons not to bother comparing:
• You are not comparing apples to apples. You may be comparing your one year old business to a 7 year old business and so it’s pointless and soul destroying.
• You cannot believe what you see on social media. So much of it is exaggerated! I didn’t know this until a year or so later when I’d met up with so many business owners who had told me a very different story about their businesses and what was really going on. Social media is made to appeal to clients so you just can’t look it as the complete truth.
• You are unique! You all have different things in your lives to prioritise. It was so interesting to me that one lady who I had been so envious of because she went to all the best wedding events was actually secretly stalking me and envious because although she had an amazing business, she really wanted a family and that was so much more important to her. She would have loved to have to say no to events to stay home with children like I had to. You never know what’s really going on behind the shiny polished look of Instagram, believe me!
The problem with comparing and trying to be too much like others is that you can end up unconsciously copying them. Your own style disappears and everything that a potential client would like about you is never seen because you’re so busy trying to be like somebody else.
As I always say, people buy from people – it’s you who your ideal clients will resonate with. Yes, you can work on getting more visible and doing everything to make sure your ideal client finds you but when they do find you, they want to see you and your message. It’s so important to be authentic and not a copy of anyone else.
So what do you do about it? It’s simple and completely in your control.
If you can follow people you admire and it spurs you on to do as well as them and inspires you to be better, then keep following them and looking at their posts. If when you see their posts, you feel sad, frustrated, jealous or unmotivated then it is isn’t helping and so there’s only one thing for it.
See that unfollow button. Press it. Right now.
It will be one of the best things you ever do.
When you’re running a business, you need positivity all around you so if something is causing a negative reaction, you get rid of it and concentrate on your own journey. There will come a point further down the line (and nowhere near as far away as you imagine) when you’ll turn their feed back on and feel nothing because you’ll be doing so well in your own journey that you’ll look back and realise there was no point comparing after all. Just like I did!